I'm going to expose my weakness. this is stupid but I'm terribly bored with my life. this will probably cause another of those breakdowns I've been having so much lately, but during those moments I've never felt so alive.
if anyone were to do something that will make me think drawing is pointless i would die.
drawing and the eagerness to know what will happen to the future is the thing that kept me going i guess, it's like hanging by a thread, and I'm also very secluded from the world sometimes i see my self as an observer but i really don't know anything. maybe i can call my self an appreciator or a watcher, i don't really wish for anything but watches as everything keeps on going and i wont allow to be disturbed as i draw my desires and feelings.
right now there's this person i admire, i'm really happy that after a long time i could feel some love in me. it relives stress sooo much but i'm just admiring from a far. but i figured why i like this person, he amuses me and we share the same view towards this world. but that's how i feel; i don't really know him that much yet. i want to talk to him more, mostly about how our hand writtings are somehow the same and the stories he makes really intrigues me, i wanna read them more. i hope i don't mess up and be friends with him someday, i don't aim for much more. i was only doing this so that something will occupy me for the time being after all.
there are things that he have that are hard to find these days on common people.
im indulging in my imaginary world again, and i don't want to look in the real world stretch out before me because it's slowly rotting as well as most of the people in it, and it's ugly
- Mood: Tired
- Listening to: tsuioku merrry-go-round by onelifecrew
- Eating: air .. (im hungry~ )